


Creature Comforts

by blueapplesour



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Hair care, Humor, Multi, Pets, mentions of doropetra
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:20:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26275540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueapplesour/pseuds/blueapplesour
Summary: Edelgard wants a cat.Ferdinand wants a dog.Hubert has a rather specific objection.
Relationships: Edelgard von Hresvelg/Hubert von Vestra, Ferdinand von Aegir/Edelgard von Hresvelg, Ferdinand von Aegir/Edelgard von Hresvelg/Hubert von Vestra, Ferdinand von Aegir/Hubert von Vestra
Comments: 21
Kudos: 101





	Creature Comforts

“It was an absolutely darling thing,” Edelgard gushes, propped up on her elbows on the plush bed of the emperor’s quarters. Here, without the weight of armor or a crown, she looks like nothing more than...well...

A young woman absolutely giddy over a cat. Rolling over onto her stomach, as if she herself were one of the bloody things. And Ferdinand, already in his sleepwear, climbing into Hubert’s lap to have his hair braided for the night, and _encouraging_ her. 

“When the Albinean ambassador mentioned bringing a cat in her post, I assumed it was a mistranslation! Was it one of those large white ones, long hair?”

“Mm, and the biggest blue eyes,” Edelgard sighs as Hubert puts a ribbon between his teeth and sets to work on Ferdinand, dividing his thick hair into sections. Edelgard’s is longer, but Ferdinand’s is by far more unruly. “She sat in my lap the whole time like a little doll, stretching her little paws, and I swear that must have been part of their strategy. They seemed rather pleased with the port access.”

That had been part of the plan Ferdinand had drafted, and no one was particularly put out by it. Now the northern territory was going to think it was the stupid cat making their Emperor soft.

“Well, we can’t let it get out that our Emperor is swayed by a little purring,” Hubert says, finishing off the braid with a small flourishing tug. Ferdinand opens his big mouth, no doubt to say something crass, but the words turn to a sigh as Hubert’s arms slip around him and a strategic kiss is planted on the side of his neck. Distraction accomplished. While Hubert is perfectly happy to whisper all manner of filth to the prime minister in certain situations, there are still certain things he refrains from putting into words in front of Edelgard. 

It’s become a rather obnoxious game between the two of them, trying to get Hubert to voice the things he wants without breaking his personal code. But that is for other nights. Tonight, heavens take them, they’re going to spend the whole night talking about...cats. 

“I think we should get one.” Edelgard finishes. 

“There are cats aplenty,” Hubert interjects. “Outside, where cats belong.” Chasing away any rats before they could darken the path of his lady. 

“I imagine the von Vestras weren’t much for pets?” Ferdinand teases, sitting up and forward. “But if Edelgard gets a cat, I would love to bring an Aegir hound in. It makes me miss my childhood pup, Remy, do you remember? I never felt so safe as when he slept in my bed.”

Edelgard exclaims an affirmative, while Hubert steadfastly denies any dog-related memories. Actually, he does have one, but it’s full of noxious breath and slobber. 

“Oh, he would fetch your riding whips, wouldn’t he? I suppose dogs and cats can be trained to get along.” 

Edelgard smiles at Hubert and Ferdinand in her charming little way, as if that should mean something. Hubert ignores it.

“Anyhow,” she continues, “I would rather enjoy having a cat. For our...my rooms. A pet.” Her cheeks are flushed, bright and excited in a way she so rarely allows herself. It brings Hubert a quiet joy to know his part in creating a world where she can spend an evening thinking about a cat instead of the war games and single-minded duties and vengeance that had consumed them for so long.

And yet. 

Hubert looks between the loves of his life. Edelgard, the focus of his entire being, without whom he would simply cease to exist as there can be no Hubert von Vestra without his lady to serve. And Ferdinand, his opposite in every way, spending years bringing out the worst in each other only to find that was the key to their best. 

He loves them both dearly, would give his life without a second thought to buy them even one more minute of breath, spends the entirety of his waking hours devoted to ensuring that both his emperor and her prime minister guide their new order to its proper role in history.

He loves them above all things...but saints, how they shed.

Waking up with copper strands in his mouth. Picking silver hairs off his jackets like lint. When he stumbled into this arrangement, it completely slipped his mind that the entirety of his wardrobe is black, meaning that every single thready hair they leave is a beacon. 

It’s a wonder neither of them are bald with the sheer numbers of hairs he finds, even Dorothea and Petra occasionally reaching over to...groom him as they pass.

“It is happening to me too,” Petra says, pointing at Dorothea, who laughs and shakes out her own mane. 

“Maybe take a shoe brush to your clothes before you go out? That’s what we do in the theater.” Dorothea suggests. He’s tried. It doesn’t matter. There is always more hair. There has to be some goddess-damned magic quality to the stuff, because no matter how careful he is, the second he steps into new light, more appears, bright against black wool. 

And now Edelgard wishes for a cat. A long-haired, white cat. His jackets are screaming at the thought.

“Do I not get a say?” interjects Hubert as Edelgard and Ferdinand toss names back and forth, from the plausible to the gradually more ridiculous. They both look at him in unison, and Edelgard tries to tuck her smile into an expression of mock seriousness.

“Of course, such an addition is indeed a matter for the Imperial Household.”

Hubert steels himself to say something he has never said before. He’s not even sure he can do it. The single syllable catches in his throat like a plum pit, robbing him of air.

No. No cat. No more hair. 

What comes out instead is: “Of the names, I think Amelia is the most suitable.”

Edelgard makes a little sound of triumph, Ferdinand some protest that _of course_ Hubert would side with Edelgard, and Hubert sinks back into the pillows, resigning himself.

He tries to sigh, but a hair sticks in his throat, and he coughs instead.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry but this got into my brain and wouldn't leave.
> 
> If you need further domestic fluff, I imagine that Hubert secretly loves their cat and uses tiny blobs of mire like a laser pointer to play with her when no one else is around.
> 
> twitter: blueapplesour


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